Love-Hate Relationship

I currently have a love-hate relationship with my Confinement lady.

She has been an absolute help in taking care of the baby. Changing diapers, burping after feeding, bathing the baby, washing baby clothes, cooking my confinement food, cleaning the kitchen after cooking, taking the night shift with bottle feeding while I can have a continuous 4-5 hours sleep at night, etc. No easy feat I would say, particular when she bears the responsibility of a newborn baby in her hands.

I learnt a few tips from her in caring for the Baby, mostly old school stuff. Some tips I could not accept because it contradicts with the knowledge I gathered from books and the Google box.

With all the chores and responsibilities on her shoulders, I am very amazed by her ability to talk, NON-STOP! She is either chatting on her phone or talking to me while I am breastfeeding. Talking about other babies she cared for, how other mothers behaved, sometimes criticizing, or simply talking about herself. And she repeats her sentence more than once!

Perhaps it is her way of de-stressing or letting off her steam (I don’t know where she gets her energy after sleepless nights). As a first time mother, I love to cuddle my newborn. I love to talk to him. But with her constant presence, I feel uncomfortable, particularly when I’m breastfeeding. The bond between mother and baby is special I could not describe it here but imagine someone babbling away while you bear your breast and cuddling a fragile human being in your arms. You get the picture.

And where can she go in the house when I’m breastfeeding in the room? She is sharing the room with the baby, her bed is there, her personal space is there! She has no place to go except the kitchen and bathroom. Well, I thought of just tolerating it since she’ll be here only for 4 weeks. Perhaps its the hormone in play, I was pretty agitated in the 1st week that I needed her to shut up. I know I’m being emotional and may say something hurtful so I retreated. The next morning, I told her nicely that I prefer quiet. She understood……but only for a few days!! And she started jabbing away again. 

2 weeks later today, she is back her same way. And to top it off, I feel my every movement has been scrutinized and judged. It is like having a mother-in-law in the house!!

I now try to breast feed in my room, with my Hero delicately sniffing around the bed and standing guard.

I need quiet…..that’s the reason I changed my jamu masseur after 3 sessions. People need to know when to shut up!



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